WORK― at PROBLEM SOLVING

If the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail.Abraham Maslow

It’s funny how one person can struggle with things changing so much and have someone so close to them struggling with them not changing.  The problem with life is so often bad timing.  Why is it that when we want things to stay the same they always seem to change?  And when we are dying for a change we find ourselves stuck in a maze―hitting brick walls at every turn―unable to escape to the new place we so desperately need to get to?

The problem of bad timing can manifest itself in many shapes, sizes, and forms. But Alanis Morissette’s song “Ironic” comes to mind as the best way to portray what I am talking about.  Lines like: “A traffic jam, when you’re already late...” (which is every day for me). And “A death row, pardoned two minutes too late.” That whole song is about bad timing.  My favorite line is: “It’s like 10,000 spoons when all you need is a knife.”  ONE KNIFE...please!  And isn’t it ironic? ...I was actually hunting for ONE plastic SPOON for my “to go” yogurt breakfast just this morning.

That’s where my quote comes in: “If the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail.”  While this quote has many applications, when is comes to life’s timing issues I think it speaks volumes regarding our approach.  Bad timing can be navigated poorly or very well...depending on how we look at our available options for a solution.  When we choose to only see what is familiar to us (a hammer), sometimes that limits our vision for solving the problem to doing it the same way we always have (by hitting the nail).  

Me feeling the AWE of the HAMMER (apparently!)

I will never forget working on Habitat for Humanity project one summer at Camp Baskerville in middle school...mostly because it was about a thousand degrees outside everyday.  The contractor that led the project was a wonderful man who really took the time to teach us some building skills.  I think I was about thirteen years old, but with supervision and direction, I built a closet that summer.  

Two members of the family BEFORE the remodel was finished

Another member of the crew working hard.

It was part of a remodel that was done to a sweet and deserving family’s house.  There was a moment when I was trying to nail a cross support rod into a tight space with an old fashion hammer (no air hammer’s on this project) and there just wasn’t enough space to finish driving the nail because of the tight angle at the back corner of the closet.  I called the contractor over for help.  He walked right in, saw my dilemma, flipped his hammer over sideways, and used the flat outside edge (instead of the head) to tap-tap-tap the nail down into place.  I had a “blond girl moment” and thought to myself “now why couldn’t I have figured that out!?!”

Yes, that's me...Many thanks to wonderful friend and fellow Baskerville attendee Katherine Sabalis Miles for digging these old pictures out of her scrapbooks!!!  Who knew my "best feature" had been documented in white GUESS cut-off jeans!?!

The answer: Limited vision.  I only knew one way to solve the problem.

I was reminded of the above incident as the man who delivered my new sofa and chair/ottoman this past week struggled to get the bottom pin of the door to my house out from the hinge last week (the doors had to come off in order to get the sofa in).  I swear he would still be there trying to get the pin out the same way over and over again unsuccessfully had I not gently “suggested” that he flip his hammer over.  Ever heard that quote by Albert Einstein? “INSANITY: Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”

After the “suggestion” was followed, he just looked up at me like “Who are you Lady? Bob Villa’s daughter?”  

My point on bad timing is this: We can’t always fix our timing issues by hammering down the nail the way we know how to. Sometimes we have to get a little more creative.  And sometimes, we just have to wait until the right helper comes along to show us a new way.  

Duke―loving the new chair and ottoman...but still hating Monday's as much as me! (taken on 02-25-13)